A wave of nausea hit mom pretty hard at about 3am this morning. My every attempt to comfort her seemed to make things worse. Feeling completely helpless, I left her in the nurses’ care and made my way down to the NICU. As I wandered in with an expression of exhaustion and defeat in the wee hours, I clearly surprised the NICU nurses. I was given a chair and I rolled up to Kinley’s incubator.
I spoke to her and probably cried a little. I complimented her on how beautiful she was. I gave her updates on her mom — mostly just the good stuff. I confessed how I felt and I promised I’d do better. I told her to keep fighting, but behave for the nurses and the machines.
After an hour, I started to have trouble keeping my eyes open and sitting up. I decided the nurses probably wouldn’t want to pick me up off the floor, so I made my way back up and found mom sleeping peacefully.